Friday, May 31, 2013

Food Blog Friday: DON'T CALL IT A COMEBACK!

What's up friends?? Its Friday again, and you know what that means!

...ok, so it hasn't meant anything special for this blog for the past few weeks. I'm sorry, OK?? Getting my personal training certificate, starting a new job, and traveling a lot have left me rather busy.. plus I had to do some research for y'all! In other words, I ate some good food :)

Today I wanna talk about The Coffee Shop Conundrum. Now, I love coffee. I think my blood type is French Roast (I like dark roasts) and I have worked in several different coffee shops in my career as an aspiring foodie. We all know of that one coffee shop... I'm not gonna name names or endorse anybody here since they don't give me free coffee and I don't wear their logo on my race kit (side note to coffee shops; Race Kit space for rent! Free Coffee OBO!) but it starts with an S and rhymes with Starbucks.

I like Starbucks; they have consistently good product and service, I like the Cole Porter Pandora Radio they play in-store, and I have been brainwashed to like their style of dark-roasted beans. The problem is, they are a huge company, and I'm a hipster. As a hipster, I have to wear skinny jeans, ride a fixie (its actually just a single speed) and I have to HATE corporate America! I can't support such a huge company, even though I can find many of my kind in their stores, fixies parked out front, blogging on their Macbook Pros after getting off of work at a local organic pizza shop.

God, I love making fun of hipsters.

The point here is, we should all try and experience the local flavor every once in a while. The problem with that is, a lot of times your local coffee shop is just some weird lady who after a mid-life crisis decided it would be "fun" to buy a $10,000 espresso machine, rent a space and go for it without ever really having been trained, or even having worked in a coffee shop. She bought a lot of carmel macchiatos, but maybe doesn't understand what a real macchiato is... So, what you get is a lot of bad espresso that is poorly prepared and hopefully covered up with lots of milk and sugar. The best thing about these places is that your barista is probably a smokin'-hot twenty-something.

So, how do we know where to go, if it doesn't say "Starbucks" on the awning?? Well, to sum it up in a sentence, WATCH THE BARISTA! He/she should have sleeve tattoos, gaged ears, glasses (with or without prescription) vintage clothing, and be able to tell you that he/she is actually an actor/photographer/musician... but who am I to talk? I'm in the same boat minus the earrings, tats, and plus that whole swim/bike/run thing.

In all seriousness, you can learn a lot about a coffee shop by its baristas and how good they are at what they do.

First of all, it is important to understand that making an espresso drink is a complicated and delicate process. The temperature of the water, the coarseness of the grind, the tightness of the coffee in the porta-filter, the extraction time, and the humidity in the air all have to be taken into account. That is not even considering frothing the milk, which is a combination of heating, swirling, and aerating. All of this has to come together perfectly, and should be enjoyed within the next few minutes to assure top quality.

I am not telling you this so you'll tip your baristas (although that is a good idea, they don't get paid very much!) I am telling you this so you'll know and understand that these things take time. If you walk into a coffee shop and order something, only to watch in dismay the sleeve-tatted dude behind the counter with hipster glasses pushes a button and watches some frothy crap come out, you've gone to the wrong coffee shop. Watch the baristas before ordering, and make sure they do things like tamp the espresso and froth the milk by hand, adjust the grind occasionally, and take their time with each drink. Yes, you might have to wait a bit longer, but if you're just looking for a buzz go for the drip coffee!

Another good idea is to quiz these v-neck wearing, beard rocking, individuals making your drink. Ask them about the espresso. If they say something like "I don't know," keep searching for that ideal coffee shop, my friend. If they say "I don't like coffee," please do me a favor and slap them. They should be able to speak intelligently about what they are brewing, and steer you in the right direction, even if you're not wearing skinny jeans. Part of proper training as a barista is learning about your product, including tasting it. A good coffee shop will know this, and only hire hipsters that like coffee and train said hipsters properly on their product.

So in conclusion, look for that hole-in-the-wall coffee shop when you can, and when you find it, make sure those punks making your drink know what they are doing! When in doubt though, that green awning is never far away... and if it wasn't for them, the coffee industry wouldn't be where it is today! Until next time, drink up and FOLLOW THE PACE RABBIT!